Tag Archives: mother

Joy Joy Joy

3 Aug

Growing up, I was never really the mommy type.  I never played mommy with my dolls.  Oh sure, I enjoyed dressing them up and fixing their hair, but I was never the mother.  When my best friend Becky, who lived next door, would come over and want to play house, I much preferred to be the dog.  She would, of course, be the baby.  I don’t know what we were thinking with a house that included a dog and a baby and that was it, but kids and their imaginations are wonderful things.

My favorite toys were always the animals.  My Little Pony, Littlest Pet Shop, Care Bears….all filled my closet.  My bed was covered in stuffed animals of all sorts.  I had Barbies, but mostly to add to the collection my mom gave me of hers.  And I much preferred, again, to dress them and fix their hair than play house.

I babysat occasionally, mostly family members.  The occasional friend of a friend of a friend, but only if they were “real people”.  Preschool was the youngest I felt comfortable watching.  Elementary School kids were my favorite though.  Helping them with their homework.  Playing games.  Letting them stay up later then they were suppose to.

Even once I got married, I was iffy about having children.  Newborns scared me to death.  The eyes!  The floppy limbs!  The lack of sleep!  OMG, the lack of sleep.  I have always needed more sleep than usual, and the thought of not getting sleep made me seriously worry about what I would become.

I remember the weekend that mindset changed.  We were in Colorado with a bunch of our friends.  A couple there brought their son.  He was only a few weeks old and I was smitten.  The running joke was that there was something in the water and I was chugging it bad.  I would snuggle and love on that tiny little man for hours, giving his mother and father much needed time off.

At the airport, before our flight home, Mr. Soup and I sat down.  And we talked.  Seriously talked.  Our path to becoming parents would begin.  That path would be short, and the pregnancy would seem like it would last forever.  I was horribly sick the entire time, even on medication.  I worked up until 41 weeks, when I went home because I was having contractions.  My coworkers were happy to see me leave, especially since it meant I was no longer vomiting in my trash can around them.

Later that week, less than 12 hours before I was scheduled for an induction, I went into labor.  Five and a half hours of intense labor and I was a mother.  I felt like my heart would burst.

Photobucket

This was what people were talking about.  This is what little kids strive for when playing house and mommy.  In that second, I knew I would do anything for this little person in my arms.

The joy she brought to my life was indescribable.  Time passes, and I only fall more in love.  Her personality grows daily and she’s grown into a “Strong Willed Child”, as Dr. Dobson put it.  Even in the midst of the toddler terrors, there is joy.

The silence when she is screaming so high pitched no sound escapes her mouth.

The head tilt she has MASTERED when she tries to manipulate the remote or phone or some other electronic from your hand.

The look in her eyes as she watches to see if you’ll come after her as she reaches for something.

Being able to recognize the good things in the midst of a breakdown has brought something else to my heart.

Motherhood doesn’t scare me anymore.  I know that this was how it was suppose to be.  I just needed to wait for this little princess in my life.

Sweet Sleep
I now understand why children play with baby dolls.  The desire to snuggle children.  The twinge in the ovaries when seeing squishy baby toes.  This joy in my life has changed so much, and all for the good.

Well, except for my waistline….

“This post is part of SOYJOY‘s What brings you joy contest. Learn more here.

Advertisements

17 Months Old

25 Jun

*sigh* I hate when I don’t publish things correctly….this was suppose to go last Saturday….

Dearest little one who is not so little anymore,

What are we going to do with you?  You are precocious and have hit your terrible twos way too early.  You know exactly what you are doing when you do it, turning to ask us even when you KNOW you aren’t suppose to do something.  That little questioning sound you make slips out and your face gives it’s angelic look while you ask.  When we say no, you pout and scream and tantrum.  Until you find something else to do.  Or you ask again, maybe this time it will be different.  But no, you will never be able to play with knives.  I’m sorry.  We are the meanest parents ever, I know.  Maybe your next ones will be better.

Mmmhmmmm

Your personality and smartness is exploding out of you. You are so aware of the world and what is going on. Mommy and Daddy have a contest that whoever touches their nose last has to change your diaper.  You’ve started touching your nose with us, and sometimes to let us know you need a new diaper.  It is adorable and you KNOW it.  Books are still your favorite thing, as well as your puppies.  It’s guaranteed if you are in one of your screaming fits, getting your “Bubba” over to distract you will make you stop crying, at least for a second.  You’ve started exploring them too.  Their noses, their ears and tails.  Throwing yourself at them too for big hugs, even if you don’t know how they will react.  You are FEARLESS!

Vhat Iz Dis?

There has yet to be anyone you can’t charm your way into.  Between waitresses and the apartment complex ladies to strangers walking in a store, you smile your cherubic smile and open those big beautiful brown eyes wider and do something cute.  A tilt of your head, giggle and *POOF* they are yours.

oooooOOOOOOooooooo

I wish I could see into your head sometimes. To figure out what makes you want to wear my shirts. What you are thinking as you grab anything with a handle to use as a purse. The reason the wheels are turning as you look at a toy and a box and begin exploring. I cannot wait until you stop speaking ItalianFrenchGermanSimish and start speaking English.

Big Girl Clothes

You are my princess and I love you so much. As excited as I am to get you to sleep in your own bed, I’ll miss waking up to you in my face. Snuggling in at night. We are slowly weaning you down to only a few nursing sessions. I’ll miss you when you don’t nurse anymore. That time is ours and I love it. My nipples will be glad of the relief though, since at night, you perform some amazing nursing gymnastics. Glaring at me when milk comes out your nose though, I won’t miss.

HEY NOW!

I love you my dear daughter.

Mommy Love

Forever and Always.  Happy 17 Months.

Mother’s Day

11 May

My Mother’s Day was perfect.  Woken up by a happy snuggly baby and hubby, reading in bed and then fresh cooked bacon, hash browns and eggs eaten in bed with the family.  Then a couple more hours of just wonderful reading before a nap with Baby Soup.

Woke up again and took a shower before joining the rest of my family over at my parent’s house.  Delicious burgers, great salsa, fantastic conversation.  Delightful day full of love.

Made it very difficult to leave this yesterday morning:

Snuggly Family Bed

Throughout the day though, my heart had moments of heaviness.  For those families and women that will never be able to have this great day.  Last year, I made several memory boxes for the local hospital in honor of Mother’s Day.  As Mother’s Day came closer, I called the hospital to see if they needed any.

They still had two left.  I’d like to think that they haven’t had any child loss, not that they haven’t shared them with the families.

But if you’ve had a loss, know that my thoughts, prayers and love are with you.  Wherever you are, whenever it happened, whoever you are – you are loved and not alone.

iHeart Faces – Celebrating Mom

10 May

Because nothing is more mom-like than picking out snotty noses.

Celebrating Mom

My beautiful cousin making her youngest son clean nosed.

For more photos celebrating mom, visit iHeart Faces.

Wordless Wednesday – Beauty

20 May
My beautiful mother and her precious granddaughter

My beautiful mother and her precious granddaughter

For more Wordless Wednesdays, visit 5 Minutes for Mom.