Disgruntled

I hate not feeling wanted. And today, even though I have some wonderful and exciting news that I can’t share quite yet, two things happened today that crushed the happiness. I knew they were both coming. And I can’t really go into the details….but it’s disappointing. Draining. Soul crushing even.

But instead of dwelling on that, I want to focus on the happy.

The beautiful weather we had this weekend. Including on Friday when we managed to get home right before this happened:

Snuggling with a 3 month old baby and being content with having a single child.

The AMAZING 70 degree day on Saturday and playing at the park after enjoying the Alpenrose Dairy Easter Egg hunt aftermath (we parked the car after the gun went off to start….probably about 10 minutes later it was over. If that.

Putting makeup on to celebrate Easter:

The Easter celebration I spent with family yesterday, Ryan included. It was so wonderful seeing him interacting with the conversation. Chasing Avi around with an egg. *sigh* It was very happy.

How was your Easter?

She Shoots…

She Scores!

I’ve been so busy lately!

I created a poster.

Cleaned house (and kept it up!)

Done lots of things for my Photog’s Helper site.

Finished editing a gorgeous session for my cousin.

Oh yeah, and am part of an amazing giveaway!

I’m feeling good.  🙂

Happy International Women’s Day!

In honor of the 100th anniversary of Women’s Day, I thought I would re-post an article I linked to a while back about Gender Disparities in the Design Field.

At WPPI, I got to attend the “Contemporary Women in Photography” panel.  It was amazing, so many wonderful and powerful and talented women: Lindsay Adler, Jules Bianchi, Joy Bianchi Brown, Jessica Claire, Kay Eskridge, Catherine Hall, Sarah Petty, Dawn Shields and Jasmine Star.

It’s important, as women, to surround ourselves with strong role-models and mentors.  To be strong in who we are as a person.  To believe in ourselves.  To love ourselves.  To know our limits.  Most important though, is to help each other.  If we are too busy back-stabbing and cat fighting each other, we can’t do what is needed.  I truly believe that if we were able to support instead of hurt, we would have had a female Supreme Court Justice before 1981, a CEO of a Fortune 500 company before 1972, admitted to the bar before 1869, the first mayor in 1887.  We can do almost everything that men can, we just have to work a little bit harder at some things.

I’m proud to be a woman.  To be the only daughter of an only daughter of an only daughter, with a daughter of my own.  I hope that when my daughter gets to be my age, the list of women’s firsts that are still to come will be much smaller.  In fact, I hope that we no longer will need to have an International Women’s Day, because it would mean that the gender differences are not needed to be remarked upon.

 

Good Morning, 2011

You are already wonderful.

You remember my husband, Ryan.  Your predecessor 2010 kinda screwed him over last year.  We had a rough year.  But you, my dear, you are already full of hope and good things.

Ryan hasn’t had any pain meds since the morning of the 31st.  He had morphine that morning.  Now?  Not even Tylenol.  He went from needing the oxycodone about half an hour before he could have it to not needing anything.  Thanks to the fact that they discovered what was causing the pain.  Apparently, his veins and arteries were randomly spasming and causing the pain both in his chest and his head.  He’s now on a beta blocker thingy that stops that from happening.  And it’s working.

It’s working so well.

This year will be full of hope.  I’m ready, 2011, to see what you bring.

Excited to bring my husband home.  Excited for my photographic future.  Excited for my other projects that I’m working.  Excited to find my new normal and see what it grows to become.  Dare I say it, I’m even excited to start working on my cooking.  I know, I’m crazy, but it had to happen sometime and apparently, now is that time.

So if you have any idiot proof meals, let me know!  I’m the type of person that can mess up boxed macaroni and cheese.  I should be a contestant on “Worst Cooks in America”.  But I’m ready to change that.

I think someone else is ready too.

Hopeful

One of the first things I do in the morning is go through my Google Reader.  There usually is a post or two that inspires me.  Whether it’s some beautiful images or great words, something will lift my spirits and wake me up.

Today, that post is from the Shutter Sisters and was all about hope for the upcoming year.

And I have hope.  Even when we have steps back, with pain attacks and headaches and chest pain, we are moving forward.

Today, friends and family are moving the furniture to our new apartment.  Today, I get to see my husband for as long as I want when I get off work.  I haven’t seen him since Sunday.

Today, I have hope.