Last night you did something that made my heart sing.
I heard you wake up, like I always do. As you probably know, I don’t sleep as solidly as I use to and am always aware when you wake up. I heard you rubbing your eyes and crawl out of bed. You stumbled over to me and said, in your precious voice mumbling with sleep: “I miss my blankie, mommy.”. You then turned around and stumbled back to your bed. I slid out and walked over to tuck you back in with your duck and bubble blanket that you always sleep with (a gift from one of my friends from college back when you were just born). You laid down and after I ticked you in, you fell asleep. You slept again until after I had already left for work. You are SUCH a big girl, I cannot believe it!
You nurse only occasionally. It’s our bonding time. You come up, ask nicely and smile at me with that cherubic grin. I cannot say no! You fall asleep without boob now, and it makes night time so much easier for all of us. It makes me super happy to see.
Leaving you home with daddy while I go to work is not as scary for me as much anymore. You aren’t scared of him anymore. You love to play the games you use to, but now you are far more active as well. Because you’ve found your words, you have conversations and tell us what’s going on. Like today, when I got off work, you came to meet me and told me all about having breakfast and the day you had. Then, you tried asking what was for dinner, but daddy had to help you just a little bit. Both of you together then surprised me with yakisoba noodles and chicken breasts you had brought out and thawed for dinner. I almost had tears in my eyes, because it made me so happy and feel so loved.
I am so proud of you, my dear. Even when you are horrible and scare me, like yesterday when you kept running away from me in the grocery store and I had to strap you into the cart (after which you proceeded to scream like a banshee the rest of the trip), you still were my daughter. I was able to acknowledge that you were just playing a game and try to explain why I had to punish you and make you stay in the cart. I never lost my temper. I was proud of myself, and once you got into the car and I explained again, you started to understand I think. You are smarter than most people give you credit for.
I love you so much. From the top of your curly head to the tips of your toenails that I barely get to cut but can always paint to match mine. You are mine and always will be my baby. Even when you insist I call you Avi.
I still love you. And always will.